Holiday adventures

This is how I once thought of holidays. Before I had to change a nappy in a cupboard-sized bathroom wrapped inside a piece of aluminium speeding 35,000 feet above the ground.

Before I saw an expansive beach as a minefield of sharp objects.

And certainly before I saw holiday nights as the grown-up equivalent of a sponsored silence competition.

All sleeping in the same room on holiday reminded us both why we moved her into the nursery as soon as she was ready (when she turned six months old - almost to the day).

If you don’t have children but for some reason want to create the experience of holiday nights with a baby follow this simple routine: Eat your evening meal about 5pm, and make sure you are finished by 6:30 at the latest (remember to allow time after eating to pick up food thrown on the floor and apologise to the waiting staff for the mess.)

Retire to your room and spend half an hour blocking out all traces of daylight despite it being brighter than the Sahara desert at noon outside.

Sit completely still; staring into the darkness with zen-like contemplation for the rest of the evening.

At no point make any sound louder than a mouse’s murmur. Don’t talk, don’t cough, don’t even breathe if you can help it.

If nights are about being quiet, the days are about spotting hazards, or as Erin likes to think of them, ‘exciting things to poke, grab, or try to eat.’

The floor in the hotel room was hard stone, which helped cool the room down and was great for hurting yourself if you slip.

The lobby area not only had the hard stone but was filled with sharp-edged tables holding delicate ornaments jut within Erin’s grasp.

Heading out to the pool meant navigating big patches of water and avoiding contact with metal objects baked by the hot sun.

Avoiding these obstacles with a smaller baby might have been easier, unfortunately, with her impeccable sense of timing, Erin picked the holiday as the exact moment to turn from baby to toddler and start walking everywhere.

Now we didn’t have a small person who would crawl under things, we had one who ran head-first into situations. Thankfully the staff and other guests were all very understanding and didn’t seem to mind when this 2’ tall creature came bounding at them giggling to herself.

I guess Erin saw the holiday as a chance to explore somewhere new; which encouraged her to find her feet after months of cajoling from both of us.

Now there’s no stopping her and she’s developed a knack for getting herself trapped in the strangest places.

I’ve found her with her leg wrapped around the bars of a baby-gate, balancing half-on a kitchen chair, and her head wedged between a radiator and a door frame. On the plus side she’s learned to say the word ‘stuck’ remarkably quick.

Exploring is part of growing up, and Erin is certainly doing that.

Our first holiday abroad showed me that just as when I thought I was getting the hang of parenting everything was changing around me.

New adventures are coming and, just like at the beginning, I’m probably woefully underprepared.

But that’s part of the fun and who wants a boring life anyway?

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