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12:18pm Wednesday 7th January 2009
IT'S the beginning of a new year, and we look to the small screen to help us to forget the miseries of the credit crunch for just a short while.
So what is on offer to soothe the winter depression?
From ITV we have Demons with hoodie bears, goggle-eyed mini monkeys and Gene Hunt with a dire American accent, while the BBC chips in with a doomed campaign to win the Eurovision Song Contest.
Worst of all, Channel 4 is playing host to the usual cast of Z listers on Celebrity Big Brother. And what a bunch they are!
Among the so-called big names we have Michael Jackson's lookalike sister La Toya, a middle aged rapper with hair like a tea cosy, a 'glamour' model with a mouth full of teeth and a boy band member I've never heard of.
The only hope is for Manc motormouth Terry Christian and Ulrika-ka-ka to lock horns big time.
In the soaps we had the departure of Psycho Sean from EastEnders in a finale that included the revelation that Ronnie Mitchell is actually played by Sharon Davies, as she executed a perfect swimmer's dive under the ice to rescue her hapless sister Roxy from drowning in the frozen lake.
Over in Corrie there was cause for rejoicing when the annoying Auntie Pam blew herself up with biofuel.
Unfortunately, she survived and has been joined in the Tyrone/Molly wedding story by the equally irritating Jackie, the pink haired Scouser mother of the groom to be.
Who's willing to chip in for Ty and Mol to elope to Gretna Green so we are spared more yawn inducing interference from this dastardly duo?
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